i wish all my choices were like walking up the hill to my house. i'm forced to continue on even though its shockingly tough because sooner or later, i have to go home. if everything i set my mind on was like that, i would have a lesser difficulty in accomplishing them. i set these goals i don't reach.

lately, i feel misunderstood. i escape moments of the day to clear my head, search some peace, and calm my thoughts. it isn't that school stresses me out, in fact i should definitely be stressing more, i just have a lot on my plate full of unhealthy, life-damaging, self-sabbotaging louise problems. i wonder what people think of me as. as an ignorant, dense, complicated, melodramatic person? which one, if any at all? or am i only an empty slate with no influence or contribution or capability to empathize my emotions. what if i am completely misunderstood? what then? does that matter? why? why is it so significant as to who i appear to be, regardless if it is correct or not, what people could only be basing on a quick opinion, and then would never even have the chance to know who i really am?

title quote: "by that sin fell the angels." - william shakespear.